Just gotta go with the flow

I try to be the best I can be in all I do and say.
I try to remember the things the hurt me and brought me down so I wont do those things over again.
What doesnt kill me will make me stronger.

I am so excited for friday.  I have a lot to do this week. 
I am scared to leave again, I have no idea what this next year will bring.  But I know Heavenly Father has a plan and I cant wait to find out what is in store.

Also I love my friends.  They are pretty much the greatest thing in my life.  I am so happy that a lot of those amazing guys are comming back to school this year after returning home from their missions and I can't wait to meet all the new people I will meet.

I am happy that there is so much out of my way that will not hold me back from finally living my life this year.  No more locking myself in my room, being anti-social, unknown pain, crappy sicknesses.  On that note .. I didnt get sick this last month! Yay!!  So happy I didnt have to deal with throwing up again.  The pain is still there but it isnt as prohibitting as it has been in the past. 

So here is to life.  Just go with the flow.  Live laugh love.

<3  Erin Christina

3 weeks

3 weeks from today I should be back in Rexburg. 
My senior year.
Lots and lots of stuff that will be going on.
needless to say school and the thought of "what if"s are weighing down on me.

I love this season.  It isnt about gifts or parties.  It is about family and friends.  I am so happy and blessed to be spending all the time that I am with my family.  Enjoying treditions.

Also it is about the birth of my savior Jesus Christ.  It made everything possible.

This week I work work work.  and need to start packing packing packing. 

I love my life.

"lifes what you make it"

<3  Erin Christina

keep it on the DL

want to know something ...

I am scared.

<3  Erin Christina

One Month

Well I have 4 weeks till I leave Texas.  3 weeks and 6 days till I am done with work.  4 weeks and 2 days till I head on back to Rexburg. 

My body is just so tired.  I hate this weather because as it keeps changing I keep being sick.  Man I have a crappy immune system.

Not much to talk about here.  Christmas is all perchased and I just have to wrap everything.  I cannot wait to spend the time with my family.  Strange, how I used to hate it, but now I look forward to when they come.

Hmmm well I guess that is everything.

<3  Erin Christina

update.

I have been lacking.  Life has just been getting away with me.  Working all the time and hardly making anything.  I really dont think I am going to have enough for school.  Babysitting a lot.  Falling way behind on my online class.  Picking up hours at work when I can.  Spending time with my amazing sister-in-laws. 

I love this season though!  It means a lot to me.  The whole meaning of thanksgiving and christmas.  I have so much to be thankful for and I want to anything and everything for those that I love.  I am not even making enough for school and yet I want to get my family something so nice each for christmas. 

...really all I want for christmas is for tuition and books to get paid for.  I hate how my life revolves around me being stressed about money.  I want to enjoy life.  I dont even hang out with friends due to the fact that gas costs me a lot of money and  I want to go as long as I can without having to fill up.

My best friend moved home on monday.  It is friday and I havent seen her.  I fail as a friend.

I am a super impulsive shoe and movie buyer (the movie this just started...addicted to $5/$9 movies at walmart)  and it is starting to really hurt me.  I think I am going to start just not carrying any money around with me. 

I have a lot of things I need to get accompished before the end of december (including my finger printing that I have put off WAY TOO LONG, they sent it to me in Aug I think.)

Well I am going to go help set up Christmas.  Change the oil in my car with my amazing brother when he comes over.  AND babysit whenever that is done.

<3  Erin Christina

Sick again?

I had a few wake up in the middle of the night trips to the bathroom last night.  I dont think I have ever felt that way before .. it was so intence and I could not stop what was comming out of my body.  It hurt so bad and so much pressure it even tried comming out my noise.  My poor kitty has no idea what was going on he just sat there with me.  and has been with me just about all day.

I think I am going to call work.  1.  I threw up everything in my system last night.  2.  Every time I think about eating my tummy starts churning.  3.  I really am hungry and want to eat but I am afraid to.  4.  My back is in major pain and I want to take pain killers but I am afraid that will come up too. 

I dont want to call out, but it will be only my 2nd call out, a few weeks ago when I has been sick.  Maybe working last night was a blessing.  I got 8 hours of work last night and if I call out today I still have gained two hours in my work week.  This really sucks. 

I really hate throwing up and having no idea why I have thrown up.  WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!!!?


<3  Erin Christina

I unoffishally have

Endometriosis.
We do not offishally know if that is what I have but we have finally labed what is wrong with me.  I do however still feel like a guineepig.  Having my doctor finally say that she thinks this could be the reason actully takes stress off me.  There is only one way to find out if you have endometriosis is to have a special type of sergery.  It isnt like a huge one but they do have to look inside of you.  I think after I graduate and come back home I might have them look into it, because well lets not kid our selfs, I do not have time to take a week off of my life to find out if I do or do not have endometriosis. 
I am being treated as if I do have it.  Birth control number 5.  I am now going to only have 4 periods a year to help try to prevent what is causing the pain.  I am not a doctor so it is hard for me to explain what is going on..feel free to google endometriosis there is a lot of info on it. 
So here is to another try on something new. 
I am trying to keep in mind always the comfort that is given to me everyday from my Heavenly Father.  I try to think  I can go on my own, but I need him and I know that he is taking care of me no matter what. 

So here is to today and in a week or so when I can start my new birth control. 

<3  Erin Christina